


I'll Be Here In The Morning

by Waywardsistershy



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Blood and Gore, Character Death, Depression, F/M, Flashbacks, Gen, Language, Multi, Other, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-24
Updated: 2020-07-24
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:40:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25493269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Waywardsistershy/pseuds/Waywardsistershy
Summary: The Reader is mourning the death of her husband, Sam, after watching him get killed by vampires in a cave on their way to the group where Mary and Jack are. The Reader tries holds it together for the sake of the mission but finds herself crying until there is commotion at the gate
Relationships: Sam Winchester and You, Sam Winchester/Reader, Sam Winchester/You, sam winchester and reader
Kudos: 16





	I'll Be Here In The Morning

I can still hear his screams. 

I can still see the blood.

I can still hear him calling out for me.

Calling out for his big brother.

I remember the exact moment I knew his heart stopped beating. 

I can still feel Deans hands pull me away as I cried out for him one last time.

My husband, Sam Winchester, is dead.

I sit outside of one of the cabins and aimlessly watch people. This feels like a dream, I think to myself. I'm going to wake up any moment, next to Sam who is going to lean over and kiss me despite my horrible morning breath, and be rid of this nightmare. I feel my lip quiver again and I can't stop the tears from falling again. I bury my face in my hands and feel my shoulders shake hard. I don't make a sound and think of anything else.

I think of the time that Sam asked me on our first date. It was nearly four years ago and I had been hunting with the boys for about a year. Sam had been giving off obvious signs that he had a major crush on me. He pulled me aside after a hunt and asked me to dinner after we cleaned up. But not so smooth. He stumbled over his words so bad that I had to stop him and kiss him right there. Since then, we had been unstoppable. 

Until now.

I stand up and try to take a step towards the woods. I need to let out some really strong emotions. My legs are nearly numb and I stumble as I take a step. Quick hands catch me and help me steady myself. I look up to see Deans green eyes staring right into mine. I can see he's trying to hold everything together like I am. I can see the pain in his eyes. I see a single small tear escape his eyes.

I lost a husband. Dean lost a brother. 

"I came to check on you," Dean pulls me into his arms and holds me. I don't know who needs it more. Him or me? We stand there like that for what seems like forever. I guess our shared pain made time stand still. I feel my tears fall again and I shake in Deans arms. He tightens his arms around me.

Like before, I think of anything but the gaping hole in my chest. 

I think of the time where Sam and I ditched Dean after a hunt. Dean thought we wanted alone time and get freaky but we had a different idea. Sam and I drove to the next town over and did a Justice of the Peace. He never asked me to marry him but we always talked about getting married one day. We just didn't have this in mind. We rolled into the next town and booked a nice hotel room where we washed up and threw on new clothes. We went to a pawn shop where Sam picked out a beautiful ring with a single diamond on it. I got him a simple band where there was already an engraving on the inside that said "FOREVER.' About an hour later we were signing a marriage license wearing those bands. 

That was almost two years ago. We even had started talking about retiring and settling down and having a few kids. But now that dream was never going to happen.

I pull away from Dean and turn around. I sink to my knees and let out a sound I never knew I had in me. Dean is there holding my face wiping the tears away. 

"Hey," His voice tries to sound firm but it breaks. "Sammy wouldn't this." A few stray tears fall from his eyes. He's trying so hard right now. "He'd want you to be strong right now. Not to dwell on his memory until this is all over." I watch has he holds back his pain. "We loose it together when we get home. Okay?" I nod slowly.

Home. Sam was my home. 

"Hey," A small voice calls us both to look up. There stands Mary. The death of Sam hasn't hit her yet. She's too busy fighting a war. I wish I was in her place. This pain and gaping hole in my chest is just too much. "Is there anything I can get you?" 

I wipe the rest of the tears away and stand up. Dean does the same. "Water would be nice," I say. My throat is dry from all the crying I have done. Mary smiles and reaches her hand out. Without thinking, I take her hand and she leads me to the well where the people here get their water from.

Mary and I have never had a great relationship. When she came back from the dead she literally hated my guts when she found out I married Sam and continued this life with him when we should have retired and started a family. But who was she to say that when she didn't even know Sam? She died when he was still just a teeny tiny baby. We have learned to tolerate each other over the last year before she got herself stuck in this apocalyptic world. Right now as we walk, I know I'm the closest thing to Sam that she has. Maybe this will bring us closer together. 

We make it to the well and Mary picks up an empty bucket. She attaches it to the rope nearby and lowers it into the well. There was shuffling of feet beside me. The girl from the cave whose name I forgot. Or maybe I chose not to remember. 

"Hi," she says softly. Her face looks as depressed as mine looks. This is the girl that Sam saved and died for in that wet and dark nightmare of a cave.

I remember her screaming and Sam leaving my side to get to her. I saw him shot the vampire and pull the girl away and push her towards me. I ushered to Gabriel only to turn around and see two vampires grab hold of Sam and knock him on his knees. I tried to make my way to him as he yelled out for me and Dean. Then a vampire took a bite of his neck and and dragged him away. A minute later, I felt my heart shattering in to a million pieces.

"YN?" Marys soft voice pulls me back to reality. She holding out her canteen that she filled with water. I take it and drink it all. It was something to take my mind off the girl and Sam. "Are you alright? I mean, aside from loosing..."Her voice trails off.

"Yeah," I look back at the girl. I can see so much hurt and sorrow in her eyes. 

"He meant a lot to you didn't he?" the girl asks. A strand of fallen hair hangs over her face. 

Without thinking I reach over and gently move it behind her ear. "Yes, he did," I give a small but pained smile. "He was my husband. The only thing that kept my feet firmly on the ground. You know he saved my life when we met. I was being stalked by a by a demon. Neither of them were stealth about it," I chuckle at the memory. "I turned around as soon as he stabbed him. He tried to play it off as something else but I'm a stubborn woman and he told me about what goes bump in the night. That seven years ago." 

The girl gave a small smile. "I'm sorry you lost him."

"Me too," I whisper. "We didn't agree that either of us should have been here. But we both knew that we wouldn't be able talk each other out of this so we both ended up going." 

Sam and I argued for what seemed like days as this mission was planned.I tired to convince him to stay and help Rowena keep the portal open. He argued that he was needed and I put my foot down and said that I was going. It went like that for days but, we never ever went to bed angry. For this very reason too. Our last kiss was right before we walked into that cave. Sam had pulled me into his arms and pressed his lips firmly to mine. The look in his eyes told me that he knew something was about to go down. "I love you, don't forget that," He had told me.

"Mary! YN!" Gabriel, the archangel, jogs up to us breaking me from my memories. "There's something going on at the gate. I think you guys should see this." 

Mary and I follow Gabriel to where a group of people is starting to form. My heart is starting to race because I don't think I can take anything else today. Cas is suddenly by my side holding on my shoulder. What for? I try to look around people as they opened the gate to get a better look but for the life of me, I can't. I look to my right to Dean. He's staring ahead and the look on his face is disbelief. Then he turns to me and I see the look of excitement and happiness return to his face. That means only one thing. I shove Cas's hand aside and I start to push pass people. Many of them were angry but they can just shove it. 

Finally pushing my way to the front, I see the boots first. My heart is racing so fast I'm sure it will jump out of my chest. My eyes trail up the blood stained pants to the blood stained shirt. Then to the glow stick around his neck to the bloodied neck where there isn't a single bite mark anymore. Then finally, I lock eyes with Sam. 

I sprint towards him. I slam my body into his throwing my arms around him. Sams arms are around me, picking me up and burying his face into my neck. The tears are streaming down my face as I smile. I look up and he kisses me firmly and I just about melt out of his arms. He's alive, I think. He's here. That or I'm also dead. But I couldn't care less, I was in Sam's arms.

"See, what did I tell you? You do get to see your little spunky wifey again," a familiar voice comes forward. 

Sam sets me down and I pull away to see the devil himself leaning on a post. I take a step forward but the hold that Sam has on my arm tightens. I twist my arm out of his hand and take a few more steps throwing my fist right into Lucifers face. He stumbles backward. He's weak from his grace draining. He steadies himself and I grab onto his shoulders and knee him between the legs. He falls to his knees. 

"I was expecting more of a 'thank you, lucifer for ressurecting my dead husband,' not the twins getting smashed with your knee," Lucifer gets up rubbing his sore dick. Before I can get another punch or kick in, Sam pulls me back.

"YN," He spins me around. His eyes look deep into mine. "As much as that was fucking hot and sexy, he's got a point." 

Taking a deep breath I say, "I'm not saying sorry or thank you to him."

"I wasn't expecting that," Sam pulls me away from Lucifer.

"What does he want anyway?" Cas walks up to us. Dean is still standing a bit aways but he and Sam will have their moment later. 

"To talk with my son," Lucifer takes a few steps towards us.

"Yeah that's not going to happen," Dean is next to Mary who has a few tears in her eyes and a small smile on her lips. "Jack," Dean turns to the nephilim who is just now walking up to us. The smile that was on his face is now fading when he locks eyes with Lucifer. "I don't want to talking to him or hearing what he has to say. He got us into this mess."

That evening, Sam and I just lay in our tent holding each other. My eyes are getting heavier by the second but I don't want to close them. For all I know this could be a sweet nightmare. Sam is stroking my hair when he breaks the silence. "You know, it was lead him here to Jack or go back to being dead. I was going to choose death again but Lucifer mentioned you. He told me that he would find you and torture you until he got Jack. I couldn't let him do that." 

"I would have done the same thing," My voice is barely above a whisper. I am so tired. "You did what you thought was right. I'm just so glad you're alive." I rub my face into his chest and sigh. "You don't want to know what it was like loosing you."

Sam kisses the top of my head and holds me tighter. "Dean tells me it wasn't pretty. Now lets get some sleep. We have a big day ahead of us." I look up at him and he sees the worry and fear on my face. "Don't worry, I'll be here in the morning."


End file.
